Buying Another Fixer Upper

Before our trip to Pensacola last week Austin said one thing, "Buy us a nice house not a junky one that you have to fix up." And I tried to do just that. I really did. But, fixer upper houses are just in my blood.
We spent four days looking at house after house, from the grand traditional home on the golf course with great space but a pool that was just a bit too small to the foreclosure that we expected to love but didn't. We saw a pre-approved short sale, a colonial with an in-law apartment, and there was that one that smelled so much like dog that we couldn't wait to finish the tour. By the end of day three (of our four day trip), we were no closer to making a decision than we were when we arrived. We knew one thing-the best house for us is one that we can customize-and afford to customize.
We ended up in Gulf Breeze in a neighborhood protected on one side by the Naval Live Oaks National Seashore and Pensacola Bay on the other. According to the listing agent "it is located in the most idealistic setting. Just add a pool and you will truly have found your paradise." The location is perfect. The house, well, not so perfect, yet...
We spent the last day of our house hunting trip meeting with a contractor for a new addition, a pool company for a bid on the pool that we hope to design, the vinyl company for new vinyl and windows and the flooring company-I can not even move in until the ugly purple carpet from 1984 is gone. We took pictures of the big yard, the driveway that is big enough for all of our cars and a basketball court for Cal. I picked oranges from the trees that line the left side of the property, as a peace offering to Austin and the other kids. Anything to soften the blow that we have yet again, bought a fixer upper. All I can do is assure them that when the work is done it will be perfect!

Gearing Up for Black Friday Shopping

I look forward to Black Friday shopping like kids look forward to Christmas. they wake up early full of anticipation and excitement wondering what Santa brought, and I wake up at 4 o'clock in the morning ready to shop-til-I-drop on Black Friday. Everyone else is in bed and it is chilly and dark; either you love it or you hate it.
I have been a Black Friday shopper for as long as I can remember. I've mastered the process of getting my hands on the best deals, the ones that seem to disappear as soon as the doors open. Years ago when I learned about price matching I stood flustered at the registers, fumbling with the ads while trying to remember which store had the best price. I later learned that price matching begins long before you get in line and can not be done without being armed with the ads, sticky notes and a pen and a good memory. From the time you get your hands on the Thursday paper, the one on Thanksgiving that weighs more than any other because it is filled with good tidings and great deals, to waiting in the check out line with an overflowing shopping cart, there is a method to the madness of Black Friday shopping that starts now.

Make A List
Make a list of all the people that you have to buy Christmas gifts for. Keep it in a spiral notebook. Include EVERYONE that you buy for-teachers, cousins, the baby that is due in early December, your secretary, your mail carrier.

Go Through Your Inventory
I shop for Christmas gifts all year while saving the bulk of the shopping for the holiday season. It is important to spend some time locating where those gifts are hidden around the house, taking an inventory of what you have bought and matching it with the names on your list to see what's left to buy.

Purge
If you have kids you know that over the course of a year their toys, clothes and shoes start to pile up. Before starting the holiday shopping clean and organize the kids' rooms. Donate toys that are no longer used to make room for new toys. Don't forget to go through books and clothes too. If there is no space in your daughter's room for the perfect shaggy pink chair she has been asking for then don't plan to buy it.

Start Saving
If you haven't already put money aside for Christmas shopping it's not too late to start. Curb spending for the month. Pick up a few extra hours at work. Bring returns and exchanges back to the store that you have been putting off. The store credit slips and cash back into your account or your credit card will come in handy on Black Friday.

Buy Black Trash Bags
Don't wait until you have a trunk full of toys and no way to discreetly get them inside, buy black trash bags and keep them in your vehicle. While some stores like Target make special shopping bags for the holidays that are large and dark red, you can't count on that treatment everywhere. Black trash bags are handy at concealing gifts until there is time to wrap them.

Fall Party Decorations: Hand Stenciled Votive Holders

Austin's 16th birthday party went off without a hitch. We finished (well sort of) the bathroom renovation just in time. I even had a chance to make fall party decorations-stenciled votive holders out of repurposed glass candle and food jars. They lined the walkway to the front door and the railings of the deck. We had a house full of friends and families for great company and a menu heavy appetizers including cream cheese stuffed mushrooms, warm Reuben dip, sweet kielbasa and more.

White lights and candles lit the deck.

I was so busy that I let Landon take over the job of making the votive holders. They were very easy to make and are great because they can be customized for any occasion.

What you need:
Glass jars from the recycle bin
Spray adhesive
Newspaper
Spray paint


Landon cut A's (A for Austin) out of newspaper in various sizes. After spraying the back side of one paper A with spray adhesive, he pressed it onto the outside of the jar. On a protected work surface, he sprayed the jar with a light coat of paint. After letting the paint set for two minutes he carefully peeled off the newspaper A. Adding a candle was the finishing touch for an easy, personalized votive holder.

How to Manage Post Trick-or-Treating Halloween Candy

Can you imagine being a kid and getting a day pass to eat as much candy as you want from an endless supply? That's Halloween at our house-the one day of the year that the kids can eat as much candy as they want. The "all you can eat" method of Halloween parenting achieves a few goals.

• The kids think we are the best parents in the world from the time they get home from trick-or-treating until they go go bed, making a fun holiday even more fun.
• The more candy the kids eat on Halloween night the less there is the next day or week.
• When they eat all the good candy on Halloween night the "leftovers" are less appealing, interest wanes and you can toss out or donate the rest without too much opposition.

So let the kids stay out as long as they can stand the cold, let them trade for their favorites, and let them eat to their hearts content so the major sugar high lasts one night instead of every night for weeks. Happy Halloween!

Is It the End of Reading, Writing and Arithmetic?

A Democratic Senator from MA, Katherine Clark, is proposing a bill that would require the Department of Elementary and Secondary Education to develop a media skills program in schools for kindergarten through high school. According to NBC News in Boston the program would teach students how to evaluate information from Internet and media sources, analyze how media messages including advertising are constructed and understand media messages, many of which are targeted toward children. It seems that Media Skills would be much more practical for today's students than learning to sew a pillow or bake a cake from scratch. Although I did find it adorable that Cal sewed me a leopard print accent pillow to display on my bed last year, in 7th grade.

Making Guns With His Fingers and Shooting Other Students

Rowan is 5 years old. He is in kindergarten. He is the second youngest and has four brothers. He gets really dirty. He plays rough. He loves to wrestle. He got punished at school for making guns with his fingers and shooting other students. I'm not surprised. I am not surprised that Rowan plays that way, he is very imaginative. I am also not surprised that his teacher, who is a twenty something and pregnant with her first baby, punished him for it.
When I was in my mid 20's, before Austin was 2, I was adamant that he would never play with guns. I remember saying that I would never allow them in my house. I thought that if I just kept toy guns away from him he would never want to play that way; like a delinquent, a violent and angry child. Then reality set in.
One day we were sitting at the table. Austin was eating chicken nuggets. He took little bites out of a nugget in all the right places to form a perfectly shaped pistol that fit right in his tiny little hand. Then he proceeded to shoot me as he said "bang, bang". That is when I realized that playing rough, and hard, getting dirty, and playing with toy guns is just inherent in little boys. I stopped fighting it and embraced it.
Rowan has been brought up with Nerf guns, air soft guns, squirt guns and yes, guns made out of his forefinger and thumb. He shoots his brothers, his sisters and even me and Dave. We hide behind couches and ambush each other. Even Davey has mastered "playing dead". The skills have been passed down by each Dermody boy, and girl. Our weapon bucket in the toy room is overflowing, a collection of favorite bazookas, knives, rifles and light sabers collected over the years.
If the same note had come home from kindergarten when Austin was in school I probably would have panicked. I might have even asked his teacher for advice or her thoughts, "Is he a troubled kid? Where have I gone wrong?" But now I am the one with wisdom. I know that boys who play with guns can turn out to be happy and healthy young adults. So Rowan took his punishment. I signed off on the note from his teacher. I had to refrain myself from adding a little smiley face next to the comment-showing her that I was laughing on the inside. Then I advised him to save imaginary play involving guns, fighting, the military, hunting, God, and Christmas-all permitted at home but taboo in school-for at-home play.

Let Your Baby Chew on Your iPhone

Babies are just as fascinated with iPhones as their parents. Of course they use iPhones, and any Android phone, in different ways than we do. We text, they chew. We talk, they babble into the drool covered mouth piece. I've never lost a cell phone to drool, but I have certainly had to replace my key fob once or twice.

When a mother gets desperate she'll give baby just about anything to keep him quiet, whether it is breastfeeding in the grocery line while unloading the cart (yes, I've done that), providing candy as a peace offering, or handing over the cell phone. Tonight, during a late night run to the store for last minute sugar cubes for a school project, I found what appears to be the greatest invention ever for any mother who has an infant or toddler and has an iPhone.

Fisher Price has come up with the Fisher-Price Laugh and Learn Aptivity Case, a protective case for the iPhone or iPod Touch that is part toy steering wheel, part rattle, part teether, and it allows babies to play apps too. Assuming that this toy works as well as it is said to, I think this is the coolest Christmas gift ever for mom, or baby. I didn't buy one since Davey is old enough to know that you don't chew on high-end electronics, and I don't have an iPhone. However, if it was made to fit an Android I probably would have spent the money just to try it out. I can tell you one thing. If they come out with an aptivity case for the iPad I'll be first in line.