Making Guns With His Fingers and Shooting Other Students

Rowan is 5 years old. He is in kindergarten. He is the second youngest and has four brothers. He gets really dirty. He plays rough. He loves to wrestle. He got punished at school for making guns with his fingers and shooting other students. I'm not surprised. I am not surprised that Rowan plays that way, he is very imaginative. I am also not surprised that his teacher, who is a twenty something and pregnant with her first baby, punished him for it.
When I was in my mid 20's, before Austin was 2, I was adamant that he would never play with guns. I remember saying that I would never allow them in my house. I thought that if I just kept toy guns away from him he would never want to play that way; like a delinquent, a violent and angry child. Then reality set in.
One day we were sitting at the table. Austin was eating chicken nuggets. He took little bites out of a nugget in all the right places to form a perfectly shaped pistol that fit right in his tiny little hand. Then he proceeded to shoot me as he said "bang, bang". That is when I realized that playing rough, and hard, getting dirty, and playing with toy guns is just inherent in little boys. I stopped fighting it and embraced it.
Rowan has been brought up with Nerf guns, air soft guns, squirt guns and yes, guns made out of his forefinger and thumb. He shoots his brothers, his sisters and even me and Dave. We hide behind couches and ambush each other. Even Davey has mastered "playing dead". The skills have been passed down by each Dermody boy, and girl. Our weapon bucket in the toy room is overflowing, a collection of favorite bazookas, knives, rifles and light sabers collected over the years.
If the same note had come home from kindergarten when Austin was in school I probably would have panicked. I might have even asked his teacher for advice or her thoughts, "Is he a troubled kid? Where have I gone wrong?" But now I am the one with wisdom. I know that boys who play with guns can turn out to be happy and healthy young adults. So Rowan took his punishment. I signed off on the note from his teacher. I had to refrain myself from adding a little smiley face next to the comment-showing her that I was laughing on the inside. Then I advised him to save imaginary play involving guns, fighting, the military, hunting, God, and Christmas-all permitted at home but taboo in school-for at-home play.

Every Preschooler Needs an iPad

An Apple - iPad2 (or slightly bigger and less expensive original  iPad) is worth every dollar for the practicality, entertainment and educational value it provides-for me and my 3-year-old. Here's why every preschooler should have one.

Dave bought me an iPad2 for my 40th birthday. Because I am a freelance writer and blogger, in addition to a busy mother, I have to use my time wisely. Some days the only writing that I get done is in the "Kiss and Ride" pick-up line at school (where kids are dropped off and picked up instead of taking the bus) or on the bleachers watching warm-ups before a ball game. With 3G capability, which costs about $30 every couple months or so, I am connected to the web just about anywhere. I can type a quick reminder note on the virtual notebook, check email, write an introduction to an upcoming article that I have put together in my head but not on paper or kill a few pigs playing Angry Birds.

Unlike an android phone which is too small for adult size fingers, or a bigger and bulkier laptop, the iPad is perfectly sized. It slips right into my purse like a small day-planner. It is also very easy for Davey to tote around under his arm. He doesn't leave home without it.

Davison is a 3-year-old iPad pro. The creators at Apple know how to make technology easy to use, for sure. From mastering the simple power button on the outside, to finding Netflix and playing Episode 2 of the old Spider Man cartoons, Davison knows just what buttons to push, where to tap the screen, and how to make the scene bigger by spreading his thumb and forefinger apart. The iPad is a handheld game system, portable TV, digital reader, even an MP3 player. An entire library of movies, downloadable books and educational games is available at the tap of a screen. Pop in a pair of headphones and your little one will be grooving to the tunes of the Bare Naked Ladies Snacktime! CD on download (All of my kids have loved Snacktime!) and drawing on a digital Etch-A-Sketch while waiting at a doctor's office or even at a red light.

I can already see my mother shaking her head in disgust that I would even suggest a $600 toy for a child. She would say that kids don't need $600 computer toys. They need books and a backyard. I agree, those things are very important too.

One goal that Steve Jobs accomplished with his innovative Apple products was easy to use, multi purpose tools to make living easier and technology work for you. Anything that makes a mother's job easier, and keeps the kids happier during not-so-fun errands and appointments, is worth it in my book. The entertainment value and practicality of the iPad make it well worth the investment.

Buy Me That: Teaching Children to be Smart Consumers

Visiting the toy store can be a nightmare. The season's hottest toys are strategically placed at a child's eye level where they can't be missed. Excited kids scan the isles looking for something to buy, toys to add to their Christmas lists.
What actually makes toys "hot" has almost nothing to do with quality or entertainment value. Advertising budget determines how popular a toy is. How many times the image of the toy is imprinted in your child's mind-through paper and TV ads-determines how likely they are to want it.
Make your next trip to the toy store a learning experience. Teach kids to be better consumers through fun, simple lessons.

It's the Size of the Package that Matters
More so than the size of the actual toy, the size of the package is what attracts attention. Point out the size of package compared to the size of the toy. Read the small print which usually states that the product pictured is larger than actual size. Talk about value for the dollar. Lower priced toys are more likely the result of less overhead-less advertising and packaging-than poor quality.

This Looked Cooler on TV
Show your child specific toys that she has seen on TV and has said she wants. Compare the real toy to the way it appeared in the commercial. If it is a doll that eats and wets, explain that once the food and diapers run out the doll may not be as exciting. Show her that the joints don't bend, the skin is hard and the doll is heavy, for example.

Avoid the New Toy Trap
If your son is just dying for the new version of his favorite hand-held gaming console, talk with him about it. Does the new system require new games or is it compatible with the old games? Are the new features features that he will really use? Check out reviews and be sure that it is worth the money. Just because it is the newest version doesn't mean that it is the best or most useful version.

Buy Me That: The Power of Toy Commercials

Resist the power of advertising and help your children be better consumers this holiday season.

Because young children don't read or can't read quickly, 30 and 60 second toy commercials send messages through pictures and music. Pretty little girls in matching outfits play in professionally decorated rooms, with two or three friends. They laugh, giggle and have perfect teeth. The message, "If you buy this toy you can be just like us. This toy is more fun than any other." Advertisers aim to hook our kids, who will then whine and beg until we buy their product.

It's mid-September and Christmas-toy marketing campaigns are in full swing. It isn't a coincidence that the new and improved versions of all the same toys and video game consoles-that we spent hundreds, even thousands of dollars on last year-are released in the fall. Introducing new new characters and cartoons is also part of the plan; a multi-billion dollar holiday marketing campaign. The advertising push starts well before the official "holiday shopping season" which runs November 1st through December 24th. In 2010, approximately 37.2% of Americans began holiday shopping by Halloween, according to the National Retail Federation!

Advertising tactics are already working on 3 year old Davison. He calls me at every commercial. "Hurry Mommy!" he yells, "That's what I want."

When I don't run fast enough in response to Rowan's calls to the TV he is brought to tears. "Now, you'll never know what I want!" I assure him that advertisers wont let me off that easily and the commercial will be on again, and again.

When Austin and Cal were little they both prayed to Santa and asked him directly for the toys on TV. They would look at the sky and say "Santa, please get me that." After a pause "He said yes," followed.

Pay attention to toy commercials for the next couple of days. Talk with the kids about them. Check back for some neat tips for helping your kids make smarter choices about what they really want for Christmas.

Best Bath Tub Toy Storage

How many bath tub toy bags have you bought with suction cups that don't stick? I've never found one that stays put with a full load of wet stacking cups and boats inside. When I moved into this house I was determined to conquer the unruly bath tub toy problem. I found the best solution, The Maytex Mesh Pockets Shower Curtain. Here's why it's great:

• Loads of pockets to separate toys
• Sturdy cloth construction that doesn't rip easily and is machine washable
• Keeps toys out of the tub for showers 

This is an inexpensive decorating item that I know you'll like it if you have kids, teens or a high traffic bathroom. It's great for organizing bath products if a few people share a bathroom.

I also have to recommend my favorite set of bath toys. Well worth it for only $6, they are the Caterpillar Spillers by Munchkin. Here's why they're great:

• Stack together, taking up very little storage space
• Solid plastic with no crevices for water to sit and get gunky
• The biggest one couples as a cup for rinsing hair
• Encourages imaginative play
• Super inexpensive and loads of fun

I would never recommend giving anyone a plastic baby bath tub as a shower gift because I can't even tell you how many of those came through the door of the thrift store that I ran in Italy. But this shower curtain, paired with the stacking cups and a nice towel makes the perfect shower gift. It's also a great tween girl birthday gift that mom will enjoy too. Just add bath soaps and spa essentials.